It was a rainy night when I was hit by a car. Everything went fast like a stroke of lightning in the sky. The water was dripping over me, blood was flowing and pieces of broken glass were scattered all over my body.
My heart was beating so loud that it was the only thing I could hear. People were coming up to me with the faces of pain and empathy, they wanted to help but they can’t. Minutes later I was becoming numb, I could feel my body starting to give up. In that moment I was eagerly catching for my breath, wanting to move, to get up because she was waiting. Flashbacks kept rushing into my mind thinking about our past, our future, the life I wanted to give her. It was our 7th anniversary and I couldn’t die just like this, not on this day.
Sirens were screaming and the medics came. Somehow I felt relieved thinking that I still had the chance of living. It made me reassured that everything will be fine and will eventually be the way it was.
I held on to my pocket, praying, just praying to God for him to give me another chance.
I still wanted to give this ring to her, to live a life worth sharing with her, to wake up every morning right next to the woman I truly love, and to have beautiful kids that we will be raising until our last breath. Oh God, I just want to make her happy with the best I can, but now all those dreams are crashing.
With the last minutes I’m left with in this world I want to reminisce the day we first met and if she could only read my mind, this is what I want to say. I love the way how you caught my attention when you were dancing and laughing with your friends at the bar. The smile that captured my heart that up until now makes me fall in love with you every single time. The days when you constantly ignored and rejected me but only turned out to be my source of strength for you to be mine. The struggles I had from courting you because you wanted the old-fashioned way, but I still did it anyway. The days we spent together knowing our most ridiculous thoughts and the nights we shared about our deepest dreams. And those moments that made me see the real you. Not everything was perfect, we went through screaming, crying, misunderstanding and hurting each other, but amidst all that, I still wanted to fight and win with you. I couldn’t let you go. I don’t want to let you go.
Now, even with my eyes closed I can still see you so clearly.
Even with my heart failing, it will still beat for you strongly.
Even with my breath loosing, I will still call out for your name softly.
That’s how much I love you, but I’m sorry, I really am. I have to leave now, I never wanted to go, but it’s time to say goodbye.
And until my last breath, you’re the only one I want to share my journey with even if I have to drift away.